Okay, maybe hate is a strong word (actually, not maybe—it is a strong word) but I really, really didn't like Valentine's Day. This dislike mainly stemmed from the fact that, at home, I saw my father and mother love each other each and every day. Sure, he bought not only my mother, but me as well, flowers and chocolates or a card on Valentine's...but he also did those things during the year, as well. My dad always buys my mom lilies on Easter and poinsettias in December. He gets her a card for Mother's dad and her birthday. Every time she goes on a trip somewhere, even if it's just a 2-hour day trip, he kisses her before she gets in the car and tells her to drive safe.

When I was in elementary school, Valentine's Day didn't seem so bad. It was a day to appreciate friends, get cards, and also get candy. As I grew up and got closer to about the 5th grade and eased my way into middle school...well, everything at that stage in life was about who was crushing on who—at least at my school it was. So I started to dislike Valentine's slowly. Because all I saw were guys buying one or two girls in particular gifts to win her over. I literally mean one guy would buy her flowers and chocolates, and then another guy would show up with a giant bear holding a heart, flowers, and chocolate. They were all competing. For the same girl. Okay, yes, she was pretty. She was nice. We can't deny these things. But at my middle school it just became a competition for the one popular girl's attention. I can't even say heart, because who takes dating seriously at that age?

Basically, it was nothing my parents taught me about Valentine's Day. To me, Valentine's Day was about showing love you should be showing every day of the year to people you care about. Not just significant others, but your family and friends and parents, as well.

It got worse in high school. By the time high school rolled around, I had basically labeled Valentine's Day as a "commercial holiday"—where the point was literally just to buy chocolates, stuffed animals, and flowers to toss at the person you supposedly "liked" to just have it tossed aside after a few months when it started to take up too much storage space...and then forget you liked the person and spent money on them, anyway. I wasn't even bitter, either. I still got cards and flowers from my dad. My mom gave me chocolates. My brother would get me a card. My best guy friend would buy me chocolates or a card. But these people are all people I also received love from throughout the year. My parents have always provided for and loved me. My brother shows his appreciation in his own way. My best guy friend would buy me flowers or gifts on my birthday, or if he couldn't do that he'd write me a letter. So getting gifts from them on Valentine's day just meant I was either getting something edible or red. So, I got attention on Valentine's, but I still hated the holiday.

As I got to my senior year in high school my dislike for Valentine's slowly dwindled to a slight annoyance. It was still, at that point, mainly about pleasing the most popular girl on campus. There was still always one or two people that had the most bouquets or balloons they were walking around with. But I just started to ignore it and focus on myself, my family, and friends. Valentine's Day isn't special and it shouldn't be special. I decided if people make it special because they suddenly get spoiled and get a lot of attention from their significant other, then they obviously aren't appreciated or appreciative of that significant other. I took on this perspective at the end of high school, but it was further solidified when I started dating Jeremy.

Sure, I'll admit that I enjoyed the first Valentine's Day date with Jeremy—our first couple of months together. It was my first time being treated special on Valentine's. It was my first time having a guy plan out an entire surprise date for me. I think Jeremy saved the surprise date for Valentine's Day for that exact reason. He was well aware I'd never had a boyfriend before. So, yes, Valentine's Day 2014 was extremely special to me and I liked being spoiled. I liked being taken to a nice Mexican restaurant and then taken to an observatory and getting flowers and some chocolate. But even before that date, Jeremy already made me feel special. He already did little things to show he cared and he would always leave me little gifts—even if it was just a sticky note or a message on Facebook or even a text message—for me to wake up to. So when my first Valentine's Day where I got a cute, handsome, charming man to myself to spoil me happened...well, I loved it. I felt special.

But I also had already felt appreciated for every single day before Valentine's that Jeremy and I spent together.

Like I said in my previous Valentine's 2016 Date post...after the special day, Jeremy and I do exchange chocolates or flowers on Valentine's Day. But we also treat it like any other date day that we set aside every month. It's nothing special. It's just a day where I find an excuse to dress up for our date and then we go out and do normal, non-special things. We spend the same amount of money on each other that we usually would and we share our time together. Just like we do every month.

I still think of Valentine's Day as a commercial holiday. It's a day where stores prey on couples who feel insecure in their relationships or who just feel like they haven't been spending enough time together. But why use Valentine's Day as the excuse to suddenly start spending time together? To realize how you're loving your significant other? Spend every day treating them special. You don't need to spend a crap ton of money on someone in order to do that. Gifts, flowers, chocolates, and items with red hearts aren't required to make someone feel special. Just your love and undivided attention, and a tad bit of quality time. Gifts are nice, but they don't mean everything. Especially if it's a white teddy bear holding a heart that says "I LOVE YOU" that'll just collect dust on a shelf or the back of the closet when the month of February is over.